Recognition

This group of boys (basketball) that are 8th graders this year, as 6th graders they didn't win a game. As 7th graders, we had our share of losses, but also some really big wins, and were able to gain enough confidence and skills to win the league championship. As 8th graders they had to battle cockiness and overconfidence on a regular basis. They lost to Summit (top team in the league) twice, but beat Eagle (3rd best team) 3 times. Eagle is who they lost to every game in 6th grade (they only play each other) As 8th graders they were able to beat Summit when it mattered and win the league championship again.

Last year, when I had them, and we beat Eagle the 1st time and then we beat Summit, the parents were showering me with compliments and saying thanks to me we were able to beat those teams for the first time ever. (since they have been playing basketball) That makes me uncomfortable (the praise). I feel like the kids are the ones who did the work and deserve the praise. When we won the championship last year, I just wanted to disappear. Yes, I was excited! Yes, I was ecstatic! Ya I was pumped! But as soon as we won, I wanted the kids to be able to soak in the glory of their achievement and I wanted nothing to do with it. They had put in the time and the effort and commitment and I wanted them to enjoy it. The parents of the kids always want the coach involved in the celebration.

I know it's part of coaching and having success, but I still don't like it. However, I think there may be coaches out there that really enjoy it? Not that there is anything wrong with it, it's just not me.

The weird part of all this, is that in my own personal achievements, like winning bike races, I want the attention and the praise! I want the trophy or medal, the podium presentation, or the mention in the news. I am uber competitive and will do whatever (legal) is necessary to put myself position to win. Doesn't matter if it's pick-up games of basketball, dodgeball, or bike racing. I cannot stand losing! Doesn't mean I don't handle it well. I know people who throw major fits if they lose. That's not me, it just serves as motivation to put in the time and training to win the next time. Not sure, but I think I got this from my dad. I know I got my competitive nature from him, as did my brothers. Dad HATES losing at anything, from sports to business, but if he does lose, he doesn't outwardly show disappointment. He may sulk a bit or appear unhappy, but a loss forces him to work harder to be better. I am the same.

Back to the basketball. The 8th grade team won the league championships again this year. The parents want to throw them a big party and make a huge deal out of them winning back to back titles. The 8th grade coach told me today, that he wants me to attend the celebration (pretty sure just cause it makes him feel uncomfortable as well, and he wants me there to share in that feeling...) Inside, I am incredibly proud of the kids and honored that the 8th grade coach wants me there. But I don't want to be showered with attention by the parents.

Don't get me wrong on all this. I like it when the kids tell the coach thanks. It's nice when the team (parents) give the coach a gift card or something as a way of saying thanks. Something small and not so noticeable really makes a coach feel warm and fuzzy inside, like they are doing something good.

But really, I don't want the praise. I don't want the recognition. I am already excited about next year and the incoming 7th graders and the chance to teach them the game of basketball, and hopefully the opportunity to help them feel the elation and sense of pride that can come from working your hardest to achieve a goal.